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Saturday, December 29, 2007

Four major things I can’t tolerate in America

Now let me state for the record, I don’t hate America as a country. And I am not unpatriotic either, but neither am I a blind patriot who is brainwashed. (In fact, I find patriotism to be illogical and non-objective)

America is great in many ways with some important benefits and advantages - its political/religious freedoms, career/money making opportunities, general orderliness and efficient control/planning (compared to third world countries at least), generous government benefits, and many laws designed to protect the common people.

It’s just that there are key elements of life, society and culture in the modern USA that I find intolerable and incompatible with who I am. Here are some of the main ones:

1) People are generally anti-social, don’t talk to strangers, don’t know their neighbors, and have an isolation mentality that makes them PREFER being alone. Thus, it is hard, unnatural and “against the grain” to try to meet people in America. (Yet ironically, if you have no social life, you are considered a “loser”; That’s what I call being caught between a rock and a hard place) If you go out alone, you tend to STAY alone. And of course, you are expected to enjoy being that way. So if you are a person who needs others or is dependent, then you may have a perpetual problem and get told there is something wrong with you, finding little sympathy. Those who are anti-social themselves or overly individualistic don’t mind this as much though, since anti-social people don’t mind others being the same way. But those who are very social like me will have a problem with it, and feel out of place. Even when people are forced to interact with others in social situations, they tend to act fake, polite and distant, which is reflective of their isolation mentality. Also, the average person only meets people through school, work, or mutual friends, and thus their social life is confined within a very small circle their whole life. So, if there are no women you are attracted to in your social circle or clique, (assuming there are females in your clique) or who are attracted to you, then you are screwed (not physically either, unless you go to a whore) in the dating arena. Thank God that the internet is helping to change this, but I should add that you don’t tend to meet quality people online in the USA but you do abroad.

2) The lifestyle consists of working to death just to survive, and pay off bills and debt. “I owe, I owe, I owe so off to work I go” is the mantra of the middle class lifestyle, as one expat put it. However, freespirits like me tend to view the purpose of life as simply to “enjoy it” through enriching experiences while growing in self-expression, not to suffer and toil to death. Thus, our attitude is “against the grain” here. Many see making money as the highest goal or aspiration, and are willing to sacrifice every aspect of existence for it, including their precious time, health, heart and soul. Few people know how to truly enjoy life or even have fun. Even at parties, people mostly talk about their work and profession. Also, the pleasures and entertainment most people indulge in are artificial and commercial in nature, rather than soulful and natural. And romance has decreased in the collective mentality and culture to almost nil.

3) The US news media, in particular the network corporate news media (e.g. CNN, ABC, NBC, Newsweek, Time Magazine), is very unintellectual and possesses no insight at all. It rarely hosts or broadcasts any deep thought-provoking or meaningful discussions. Instead, they either attempt to instill fear and paranoia in you with reports of disasters and tragedies, implying that the only “important news” is “bad news”, which I strongly disagree with. I’ve never understood what good they think comes out of telling everyone “bad news”. Nor do I understand why “bad news sells” since it doesn’t “sell” to me. (Maybe I’m just weird) Or they constantly try to distract you and waste your time with mind numbing trashy content, covering trivial stories that are completely useless and irrelevant to the average person’s daily life. In the process they waste billions of dollars of expensive broadcast air time which could be used to cover meaningful and higher quality content instead. Rarely do they cover anything useful, enlightening, meaningful or positive that can change your life for the better. Thus, a person seeking to expand his/her mind, soul or cultural awareness will get absolutely nothing from the US network media, except maybe an insult to his/her intelligence. I hear far better discussions about world events and how things really are in pubs and youth hostels than on TV. The US media assumes that viewers are dumb and address the audience as though they were talking to “lemmings”, which to me is insulting as well as a waste of my time, contributing nothing to my rich inner world at all. In fact, every time I turn on the news, I feel that it’s constantly trying to “dumb me down”. Thank God that there’s PBS, the Discovery Channel, and the History Channel which have far more respect for viewer intelligence, or else I wouldn’t watch cable TV. That juvenile computer hacker helping Bruce Willis in the movie “Die Hard 4” put it well when he said, “The news wants you to live in fear, so that you will feel empty and consume useless junk.”

4) The women in general are extremely anti-social (unless they are old, unattractive or very poor), do not like to meet people, have a deep subconscious hatred of men, do not need men, do not even need the company of others, set standards that almost no man can meet, have a sense of entitlement that is off the chart, are unromantic, unsensual, untender, and very unfeminine in their attitude, looks/dress, personality and behavior. And if you add the qualities in number 1 to this, it gets even worse, so you realize that trying to meet or date women in the US can be a total nightmare, and an exercise in futility. As a result, there are too many men, including me, who become couch potatoes, overeating and masturbating, having no choice. In short, the women simply don’t want to meet you, and there’s not much you can do about it.

Now, since meeting and dating beautiful women is one of my biggest passions in life, one I can’t live without, the conditions of number 4 are a BIG NO-NO, intolerable and totally unacceptable. Thus we have a problem. Some men can tolerate it, but not me. Being dateless and sexless is one of the three things in life I can’t stand (the other two being fatal heights and early mornings) but alas, dateless and sexless is what I am in America, no matter how hard I try to change it. And since I love to socialize, have quality conversations, and meet quality people, number 1 is a big no-no too, leaving me lonely and bored.

Number 2 and 3 are more tolerable (despite the title of this chapter) for they can be avoided or worked around through alternative choices and lifestyles. But still, they attempt to invalidate me, for the US media assumes by default that its viewers are unintellectual, conformists to the workaholic rat race consumerist lifestyle, and think within a very narrow box. If you are a freethinker or freespirit who thinks outside the box, then you don’t exist to the US media, and thus are invalidated.

Furthermore, as mentioned in number 2, many see making money as the highest purpose or aspiration in life, and for them, American offers them great opportunities to achieve their highest goal. But no true intellectual would set that as the highest aim. Thus, the US lifestyle offers little for the true intellectual or freespirit like me, and in fact, who they are tends to go “against the flow” of society.

Anyhow, because of number 4 and 1, there are just too many lonely depressed men who become couch potatoes, eating potato chips, watching TV, and masturbating when horny, cause they have no other choice. But who is trying to help them? Definitely not the US media. Only a few resources are, such as me and my website. But unlike some sources, I am not full of any BS, but a truth seeker who tells it like it is. That you can count on.

Strange contradiction in US social life - Between a rock and a hard place

What’s ironic is that the US social atmosphere is inherently anti-social and isolationist so that trying to meet people goes “against the grain”, yet if you have no social or dating life, you are considered a “loser” and told that there is something wrong with you. That is a strange contradiction that puts one between a rock and a hard place. It doesn’t make sense, and is both illogical and weird. In an anti-social isolationist culture, shouldn’t it be more “normal” to not have a social life than to have one?


  1. *** WWu, this is very good essay. I too have all but given up on a dating life in the USA. It is just impossible to meet attractive women. I think this mainly has to do with the shortage of attractive women (which is due to the recent sex ratio imbalance caused by the Baby Bust that has never happened before in human history, as well as the obesification of the American Woman), which allows them the ability to not have to date outside their little clique (only strange, desperate, or slutty women would allow themselves to be picked up by a stranger - unless he looked like Brad Pitt, of course.) This causes men like us who - through no fault of own - have poor social cliques to be unsuccessful in the USA. Women in other countries, like Eastern Europe or in your case, the Filipines, do not have near as much ability to date within their own clique, so they are open to being picked up by a stranger.

  2. The reason America is like that is because it's all a big plan. A big plan for the drug companys, corporations and government to screw up citizens as much as possible so they can sell them more chemical drugs, unecessary surgeries, shitty chemical food and make them work like slaves to buy more and pay more taxes.

    North American women are fat because they hate men. That's my theory about fat North American women. European women are not as fat and they don't hate men as much. There is a connection for sure!

  3. It's amazing how many good looking guys I see with ugly girls here in America! I also see guys who are in shape who are dating fat chicks!Men in America have to settle and get any chick they can find, while women in the US can have just about any guy they want! That does not sound fair to me! I need to travel to other countries (like eastern Europe, Russia, Asia and Latin America) to meet some women!

  4. The dating scene in the USA is a joke for men! Men in America need to "jump through hoops" to try and impress American women. Then, even a guy does get a girlfriend in the US she is usually either overweight or unattractive or has a crappy attitude!

    The solution is to travel to foreign countries and meet women that way. In the mean time, save as much money as you can and then go travel and have fun!


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