Share This Page

Thursday, June 11, 2015

12 Reasons Why Men Have A Better Dating and Social Life Abroad

You know, when we HAers (HappierAbroaders) spread our good news gospel that Western men and East Asian men (Taiwanese, Japanese, Korean, Singaporean) can have a better dating and social life overseas, we often hear the following one or two explanations from the mainstream crowd. These are cliches that attempt to invalidate our message and support their politically correct belief that people are the same everywhere:

1) You are a foreigner and have novelty appeal over a local, so they see you as a chance to practice their English and learn about your culture. Many also feel obligated to treat foreign visitors with hospitality too, so they try to be extra nice to foreigners so that they will have a good impression of their country. (e.g. white people in China and Taiwan usually get extra hospitality from locals)

2) They perceive some potential benefit from knowing you. If they are from a less developed country, they think you are rich and so your money gives you social value. Or they may be hoping to get a visa or green card to America or a more developed country, so they see you as a ticket to move abroad for a better life.

Most people give one or two of these explanations and assume that's all there is to it. Now I acknowledge that these are valid factors that apply. But they are not the only ones by any means. There are many more. The two above are superficial explanations that miss a lot of other significant factors, so they are woefully incomplete. I get tired of hearing such cliches, so I will list 10 more reasons below which are logical and make sense to help you see the bigger picture and broaden your understanding. Please read all of them with an open objective mind. I promise you will learn a lot from this. Please forward this article to anyone you know who spouts the above two cliches or who has any interest in this topic. Since reasons #1 and 2 have already been given above, I will start with #3.

Why Men Have A Better Dating and Social Life Abroad - More Reasons and Factors

3. In the book "The European Dream" by Jeremy Rifkin, it mentions that Europeans place a higher value on social relationships, whereas Americans care more about becoming independent and acquiring private property. The American emphasis on privacy and property ownership as the keys to happiness and freedom are outdated ideals from the 1700's, Rifkin explains, whereas European cultures have evolved beyond that and now focus on cultivating quality social relationships and social life as the means to happiness.

This explains why me and many others who have visited Europe, report that the social vibe and social atmosphere there is much more positive, open and happy, than in America. Basically, some cultures are more socially open than others. In addition, Europeans are more open minded and broad minded and curious about the world; which is why they travel more than Americans do. As a result, they are more open to talking to strangers in general. In Europe I experienced this firsthand.

Similarly, in a public lecture recorded on video called "The Happiness Prescription", the spiritual teacher and bestselling author Dr. Deepak Chopra was asked by a woman in the audience why she felt happier in Cuba and Mexico than in America. In response, Dr. Chopra explained to her that in America the focus is on consumerism because America is a consumerist culture. But in Cuba and Mexico, people do not have enough money to live for consumerism, so they focus on social relationships instead. As a result, people feel happier because they derive their fulfillment from social connection rather than from consumerism and materialism. And foreign visitors (such as the woman in the audience) often report feeling happier there as well, even though such countries are less developed. Thus this is a big factor for us as well.

4. Americans are conditioned to be paranoid of others and live in fear. They have an aversion to other people and need extreme amounts of privacy. Thus they are inclined to being socially isolated and segregated from others, which is not natural or normal as humans are not meant to be solitary creatures. There is an ice wall between strangers in America (hence the term "breaking the ice"), and even neighbors do not know each other (which wasn't the case prior to the 1980's). Many social studies show that Americans have less friends today than they did decades ago (See the book "Bowling Alone" by Robert Putnam). But not all social cultures are like this fortunately. If you travel to more foreign countries you will see what I mean. Most likely this unnatural paranoia in the US is engineered by the elite to keep people divided so they don't unite against the ruling elite. It's the old divide and conquer strategy.

5. Russians are deeper and more authentic than Americans, and they hate fakeness. Russian culture and people are highly genuine and real in a deep way that can't be explained in words. When you are there, you can feel the deepness of the culture and people, it's a totally different vibe that can't be described in words and is very refreshing. Russians hate fake smiles, so any smile you see there will be genuine. So I connect with them easier because I'm very deep and authentic too. I don't have to be fake around them like I have to be in America in order to fit in. This means that I can be myself, which is the true definition of freedom. After all, if you can't be yourself, you aren't free, regardless of what Constitution you live under.

Also Russian culture is very flirtatious so I can be myself and flirt with girls all I want there. But I can't do that in America or else I'll get in trouble. Besides Russia, most other foreign countries do not require fakeness in their social culture either, at least not to the extreme degree in America.

6. American women have the worst attitude and the fakest personality that is highly toxic. Google "American women suck" and then "French women suck" or "Chinese women suck" and look at the results. There's no comparison. Googling "American women suck" produces millions of hits, much more than women elsewhere. That speaks volumes. It's well documented that Americans are narcissistic too. Cultures spoil women when they give them too many rights and entitlements.

7. Russia, China, Philippines and Latin America are pro-male cultures. Men have a lot more power and rights there. They still have a patriarchal mindset. So men are treated better there than in America, which is an anti-male culture and matriarchal society where women are the boss, as we all know. This means I will be treated better in such countries as well, which I have experienced.

Ask yourself these questions:

- How come average men in Russia, Latin America and Philippines don't have trouble getting dates? How come there are no dateless men there like in America? How do you explain that? Obviously, reasons #1 and 2 above do not explain this.

- How come in Asia you see many average, ugly or nerdy looking guys with attractive hot girls everywhere you go? But in America you will NOT see that, instead you see average women with tall attractive men who are better looking than they are. How do you explain that? Again, reasons #1 and 2 above cannot account for this.

The only explanation is that Asia is strongly pro-male whereas America is strongly pro-female. In Asia, men have more power and choices. But in the US, women have too much power and too many choices whereas men have few choices or none at all. It's an inescapable conclusion.

8. In most foreign countries, women are taught that they NEED MEN to raise a family and be normal. So their women seek fulfillment in men and have to be feminine, sweet and kind in order to attract men. But in America, Japan and Western countries, women are taught to NOT need men, but to be independent and empowered. Thus they view men as unnecessary and can afford to be super picky and refuse to settle for nothing but the best, which gives them leeway to become spoiled, difficult and narcissistic.

That's what happens when women are given too much power, economic opportunities and benefits. Or when they are given equality with men. Ancient and past cultures -- from ancient Greece and Rome all the way up to the 1950's -- understood and realized this. That's why they didn't spoil their women, because if their women decided that they didn't need men, then the human race would be in danger of going extinct, or at least their tribe and clan would. Thus ancient cultures were wiser (contrary to popular view) than modern liberal western culture is.

"Woman is a violent and uncontrolled animal, and it is useless to let go the reins and then expect her not to kick over the traces. You must keep her on a tight rein . . . Women want total freedom or rather to call things by their names total licence. If you allow them to achieve complete equality with men, do you think they will be easier to live with? Not at all. Once they have achieved equality, they will be your masters . . ."  
-- Cato the Elder 234-149 B.C., quoted in Livys History of Rome

Even the most powerful woman of the 1800's who ruled over the British Empire had this to say about "women's rights":

"I am most anxious to enlist everyone who can speak or write to join in checking this mad, wicked folly of "Women's Rights," with all its attendent horrors, on which her poor feeble sex is bent, forgetting every sense of womanly feelings and propriety. Feminists ought to get a good whipping. Were woman to "unsex" themselves by claiming equality with men, they would become the most hateful, heathen and disgusting of beings and would surely perish without male protection. I love peace and quiet, I hate politics and turmoil. We women are not made for governing, and if we are good women, we must dislike these masculine occupations." 
-- Queen Victoria, 1870 

That was why men and women could not be equal before the advent of modern feminism. There was a good reason for it and it had nothing to do with misogyny or prejudice. Everyone understood that men and women were fundamentally different and had different roles, so gender equality made no sense. You see, when women are made equal to men, the consequence is that large numbers of women will start to decide that they don't need men, and the results of that are disastrous, since men still need women.

Fortunately, pro-male cultures such as Russia, China and Latin America still retain the same wisdom that our ancestors did, and thus are still patriarchal cultures where men have more power and ample dating and mating choices.

9. Most Filipinas are sweet, easygoing and nonjudgmental, so they are the easiest ethnicity to get along with, and the least uptight. They are simple and easy to please, and so they appreciate us men more. A man doesn't have to put much work into a relationship with a Filipina. He can just be himself and feel valued and appreciated. That's the beauty of it. You won't get that in Western countries, that's for sure.

Being nonjudgmental, most Filipinas aren't picky about looks, race or age. Thus they are much more open toward interracial dating and dating older men -- unlike Western and NE Asian women. This is great news for: a) average looking guys or guys who don't have looks going for them, b) men of other races (unless they are dark skinned I hear) and c) older men who want younger women. In contrast, Western white women are more cold and independent, and strict about wanting a specific type of guy -- usually tall, athletic and of similar age to them.

10. In countries such as the Philippines, Russia and China, there is a surplus of single women who can't find a quality guy. And there is a big shortage of good decent men who have at least a middle class income and don't have bad habits (like drinking and gambling). So the numbers are in your favor if you are a decent guy. In such environments, the females have to be sweeter, kinder and prettier to attract good males. This works in your favor if you are a male and gives you more power, choices and advantages. It's the exact opposite of feminist Western countries where women have all the power, choices and advantages.

11. Moreover, Chinese and Filipino men usually only want young females who are virgins and have never been married. That weeds out many Chinese and Filipina women who aren't virgins, have kids, are divorced, or older. This means that there are many unwanted women in China and the Philippines who are eager to find foreign partners for the above reasons. This means there are more women who WANT YOU as well. Much more than in Western and First World countries.

12. Finally of course, women in less developed countries have less money, so they are more humble, modest and unspoiled. Humble women are easier to get along with than arrogant women of course, and they are friendlier as well. They do not seek to be independent, rather, they dream to find a good man and become attached to him.

Poor people are also more interdependent. They have to depend on others to survive and get by. They live in a world of "people helping people". Thus they are more SOCIAL since they need others and are not independent. They are also more compassionate as well. In contrast, the richer you get, the less social and less kind you become. Many social studies have proven this correlation.

In contrast, modern USA girls are the furthest thing from humility. They are extremely spoiled, dissatisfied, have a bad attitude, have an entitlement complex, are super picky, act super arrogant, and are not humble or not down to earth at all. Trying to find humility in America is like trying to find a needle in a haystack. Even American movies depict this.

When it comes to arrogance and fakeness, no country in the world compares to America. Just to look at American movies for example: 99 percent of them are highly unrealistic and full of delusional fantasies. But French and German films on the other hand, tend to be far more realistic and meaningful, without all those fairy-tale happily ever after endings that American films are notorious for. So even in films and media, one can see what I mean.

Obviously, arrogant and fake people are the hardest to get along with. That's why in America, social groups do not get along harmoniously at all like they do in Asia, instead there is constant tension and friction between people, including families, friends, colleagues and roommates. American social relationships are like never ending ego battles that seek competition rather than cooperation, and isolation rather than connection. All this only makes the loneliness in America worse. In contrast, foreign females who are humble, authentic and down-to-earth are much easier to get along with and deal with.


So you see, these are all real major factors and aspects in the big picture of why Western men and East Asian men have a better dating and social life overseas. But the politically correct mainstream do not take them into account for some reason. I wonder why. Anyhow, I hope you contemplate the above and see that there is more to all this than you imagined. Please forward this article to anyone you know who has any interest in this topic so that it will make sense to them too. Sorry that this got really long-winded. I hope I've broadened your mind and enlightened you about the dating wonders of the world beyond your country. Thanks.

Winston Wu​


  1. I do agree that online dating in America/Westernized countries is lousy. I do agree that American/Westernized women, some but not all, are difficult. I do agree that I can meet countless women in foreign countries but have a hard time even meeting a woman for friendship in United States.

    This author has spoken the truth 50 too 100 percent.

  2. Excellent post but why you talk only about toxic America when in fact all Western countries are deeply sick almost as much? Its far more than a single nation's problem.

    1. excellent point - I think the author picked America based on personal experience

  3. Guess what? Not all American women are arrogant whores. The churches are full of nice, sweet, cute girls who can't get husbands because there is a shortage of marriage-minded men. Most American men want to sleep around with no commitment. So what happens? After being trashed by several men, most women give up being "nice and sweet" because society PUNISHES women for being kind, non-judgemental, spiritual, or even being chaste.

    While guys like you are ranting about all women being arrogant whores, lots of women who are not like this are being left behind.

    My question: why do AMERICAN MEN chase after evil, arrogant whores instead of flirting with women who have moral character? Perhaps because women of character won't do it on the first date?

    1. As for churches, no your wrong, they are not filled with sweet, nice, cute girls who cant get husbands. I see the exact opposite. most churches today are nothing short of in-crowd social clubs where most of the females are not friendly at all.

      "why do AMERICAN MEN chase after evil, arrogant whores instead of flirting with women who have moral character?" there are actually very few women in this country that have any morals. ill tell you the kind of AM who chase evil, arrogant whores...their called bad boys

    2. I went to a few churches that had a lot of hot women, but they practiced what I refer to as "church feminism". Church feminism is the notion that women are ENTITLED to support from a man as a God given right and are often just as ungrateful for a man busting his butt to earn a living as much as regular American career women. Sometimes they are indistinguishable. For example: I briefly dated a church feminist who played some games with me to make me prove I was worthy of her (stood me up on dates to see how I'd react) and then gave me a laundry list of what she wanted: Big house, big diamond ring, big expensive wedding and later, she'd "earn" it by having kids and cooking dinner. It was a big list of **** dumped on me while she did as she pleased. It was largely just like regular feminism.

      Keep in mind that in traditional, non-USA cultures, women do "work" but aren't career women just as most men aren't really "career"men. In the Real World, people (men and women both) work because they HAVE to. To EARN a living. Only feminists and spoiled American women think the world is one big playtime where work is something they do for fun or staying home is a "sacrifice" or entitlement. Feminism is merely an extension of western chivalrous patronage. The notion that women are princesses to be protected and pleased by men and that men must "prove their manhood" by pleasing women. It caught on a few centuries ago and got toxic recently and permeates nearly everywhere in the states, including many churches.

    3. I think it's a matter of personal choice - see attractive American women are hit on a lot. Not only that, but they are also the most targeted demographic and most exploited demographic in America (#bigmoney). So they play hard to get sometimes - and that can be fun. A woman who is hard to get and likes to be chased, and maybe is a bit arrogant and harder to connect with, holds a special turn-on for some men. Western Women put up what's called a "bitch shield" to weed out the more sensitive guys, and get the guy who really want "it." To each his own...Great article btw :)

    4. I am an American guy.

      I went to different churches most of my life. Yeah, I met some nice people. The girls were nice. There was one girl I liked and I regularly saw her once or twice a week. I found out that she did not like me. I barely even talked to her because she was more interested in talking to other people.

      The women in church may be nice and so. But, the women I met overseas are nicer. I am good friends with a woman from Colombia. I have never met an American woman like her.

      Truthfully, foreign women are more attractive and easier to talk and attitude problems. Even if a guy meets a foreign woman who is arrogant, shady, or not interested in him, he can easily move on to other foreign women who are better. In United States or another Westernized country, he may not have that chance.

  4. ...And of course if you are an atheist, you are probably fed up with Church girls anywho.. They are either crazy and overly impresionable or they are fakes and pretend to believe whatever is in their best interest. If you are not a true believer, China is a much better bet. Friendly and pragmatic and if you get a good one, quite good with money, whereas in the US good with money means good at spending yours...


Please do not leave spam or advertising junk on this blog!