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Saturday, August 30, 2014

The Quadruple Whammy Against Single Guys in America

Dating is the worst in America because of the following major obstacle and barriers:

1. Women in America don't talk to strangers. So you can't really go out and meet them in any natural friendly way, unless you have connecting friends. You can't approach them or just walk up and talk to them (like you can in most other countries). Nor can you flirt with them either. To attempt to do so is considered taboo, creepy and inappropriate. They have an antisocial ice wall around them and a cold uninviting vibe. Around people, they act very standoffish.

To make matters worse, in American social culture, people don't talk to strangers unless it's business-related, or they have connecting friends. So the general social culture is against you as well.

2. Every desirable girl and woman claims she's taken. And most of them actually are, though some may say that to ward you off. Out in public, every girl seems to already have a guy. You don't see any single available girls that are looking to meet someone. And if they are single, they are either not looking or too picky. So overall, they are all either taken, not looking, too picky, too young, or too fat and unattractive.

It's a no-win situation where many single guys have no options or choices. There is definitely a severe shortage of quality desirable single women for sure, unlike in many other countries, where quality single women are plentiful and in abundance. It's like if you didn't find a partner in high school or college, then you are completely shut out of dating and relationships in America, which totally sucks big-time.

3. Nearly all American women are super picky and only want the top 10 or 20 percent of men in terms of looks and status. This leaves a large percentage of single men out in the cold with no options or choices. So even if you do find single women you like, they are all going to reject you if you aren't considered a "hot guy" in America. Women are overvalued in America and have too many guys to choose from, so they become spoiled and super picky. They all think they deserve the best and have insanely high standards. Only a small percentage of men are good enough for them. 

You will see many average looking women with tall attractive men in America, which means that those women are getting men who are better looking then they are. So if you are not a tall hot guy, then you have no chance, and every girl will tell you, "You're not my type". To get any woman, you'd have to lower your standards to rock bottom, which is crazy. Why would you want to do that when you have much better options abroad?

4. Most American women are very spoiled with a toxic personality and bad attitude. They act bitchy, angry and entitled, and are prone to having hot tempers. You must obey them (aka "listening to them") or else. You will not find any humility, humbleness or feminine sweetness in them. They are very self-centered and arrogant too. 

So even if you are able to get into a relationship with them, you will have to put up with a bad personality and attitude, which is very emotionally and psychologically draining. They are like energy vampires and time bombs that will explode whenever anything doesn't go their way. It's like walking on eggshells, one mistake and they blow up or dump you. They are not relaxing to be around at all. 

Also, the way they act and talk tends to be phony and artificial, so they are very hard to connect with and vibe with. As we all know, men are generally more down-to-earth than women are in America (except for older women). Even women themselves admit this. This creates a fundamental SCHISM between men and women, making it difficult for them to connect or relate to each other. If you are a down-to-earth authentic guy, American women will tend to find you boring or even look at you with contempt. It's really weird and messed up.

In summary: Women don't talk to strangers in America, so you can't really go out and meet them in a naturally friendly way. They all seem to be taken and unavailable too. If they are single, they will be super picky and only date a small percentage of guys who meet their high standards. But even if you are able to date them, you will find that they have a spoiled toxic personality with a bad attitude and hot temper, along with a phony arrogant demeanor. So they will not be easy to get along with at all.

All this combined constitutes a quadruple whammy against single men in America, making it the worst dating scene of all-time! It's like there are four impenetrable barriers blocking your way. Getting through even one of them is difficult enough, but four?! Basically, everything is against you if you're a single guy in America. It can be likened to a chess game where you have no move because your King is in check and cannot move to any adjacent square. All you can do is play a different game (abroad) where you have actual moves on a fair playing field. All this is very obvious but you are not allowed to talk about it of course, because in America, only losers complain, even if they tell the truth. 

The only way to overcome this quadruple whammy, if you want to stay in America, is to become popular within a large social network, which will give you more social opportunities to meet women. But this is not easy or natural at all. In order to achieve this, you have to fit in socially and conform. And to do that, you have to develop a fake, phony, artificial personality, because American social culture is fake, phony and artificial. 

Additionally, the social vibe is also toxic, so you have to develop a toxic personality to fit into it as well. That's why there are so many toxic personalities in America. You can't just be yourself and fit in socially. No way. You gotta be some kind of poser. The whole thing is very awkward and unnatural to say the least. But even if you manage to join a good social network, it's still no guarantee that you will find a woman you like who likes you.

What this means is that if you are authentic and down-to-earth, and you insist on being yourself, then: You will not fit in socially, you will not be popular, you will not have a large social network, and you will not be able to overcome the quadruple whammy above. It's a very sad state of affairs, and needs to be exposed. 

A much better solution is to go overseas, as I've explained, where you can be yourself and have a good social life and have real dating choices at the same time. Being able to get what you want, while being yourself, is definitely the best scenario by far. Thus going abroad is the most logical and sensible solution.

But most people don't tell you that. Instead, they tell you to change yourself or improve yourself, as if you must be the problem, even though you are not responsible for this quadruple whammy and did not make or create it. It's a huge victim-blaming fallacy. But that's how most people are conditioned to think unfortunately. Well, now you know better so you can stop listening to bad useless advice.

The New Age/self-help/motivational crowd will also give you useless advice. They will tell you that if you think positive and raise your "confidence" or "self-esteem", you can change all this. But that's not true at all, since self-esteem and positive thinking have NOTHING to do with any of these four whammies obviously. Such New Age claims are greatly exaggerated and will only lead you on a wild goose chase while filling your head with imaginary concepts that don't work and aren't realistic. I know because I tried them many times and they accomplished nothing. 

At best, such New Age teachings will only help you to feel better temporarily. They may help you to cope, and they may help you to feel positive and motivated too. But positive thoughts are NOT going to solve your problems. Nor will they change any of the four whammies. Thus the self-help industry is really no different than therapy. Now use basic logic here. If real problems were easy to solve (i.e. by thinking positive thoughts), then they would not be real problems. Duh. There is so much bullcrap in the New Age movement these days. 

The key difference between us and the New Age/self-help/motivational movement is this: We have real solutions. They don't. They unjustly and falsely try to pin the blame on you. We don't. They give you useless crap. We give you useful substance. Enough said.


  1. The US is just another China ratio wise (I sometimes call it "Americhina" or "The US of China"). Men outnumber women by a lot in BOTH the US and China, which means there are millions of men who are unable to find a life partner because there's not enough women in general to go around. Every girl is taken with a bunch of extra guys left over, and it doesn't matter if she's hot, average-looking, or fat and ugly.

    1. But numbers aren't everything. China women are more feminine and down-to-earth. American women are way too arrogant and toxic. How do you explain this: When I join a Chinese dating site like Chinese Kisses or Chinese Love Links, I get lots of responses from Chinese women. And when I talk to them on the phone, they are a lot nicer, sweeter and easier to connect with? They certainly show a lot more interest and treat me better. That's for sure. The difference is greater than you can imagine. So no, I would definitely NOT lump China and America together in terms of dating.

      In contrast, on US dating sites like, OkCupid or Plenty of Fish, I can't get any girl in America to write me back, even if I send out hundreds of letter! How do you explain that? The difference is HUGE!

      Did you go to China and have a different experience? Why are you saying that?

    2. I've never been to China before, but I've heard they had a one child policy in the 80s. And families had preferences for boys over girls. So families had a practice of aborting female fetuses in favor of male ones. I came across a lot of news sources from around the globe about how single men are starting to outnumber single women in China. However the women in China are far more down to earth than in most of the US.

    3. I hv spent a lot of time in China, had many Chinee GFs and ended up marrying a stunningly gorgeous Chinese woman, former model, and bringing her home. (Of course Im blond w blue eyes, your mileage may vary...)

      My experience is that China is VERY different from the US. In fact you wont notice the sex population discrpency at all as a foreign person because most places you go you will be seeing women out doing things, working etc. Many Chinese people relocate for jobs and the jobs are pretty sexually segregated. The women do light industry, service, high tech etc. The guys do more heavy industry and physical labor or theyre working in some corporate type office where you wont likely be running into them.

      As a foreigner you will stand out as different and BE different and interesting, exotic.. a window to another world and a different culture that they will find very interesting. They will WANT to talk to you though maybe they wont be able to due to language issues.

      All this means that you aren't competing with all those relationally dispossessed Chinese men. You are in a category all alone, or with other foreign men who are relatively rare even in big expat cities like Shenzhen or GZ because face it the Chinese population is so huge that even if we all showed up on the same day we wouldn't be a drop in the bucket. Add to that all the stories and "myths" going around about us there and we are magnets for attention.

      Turning attention into actual attraction and a potential relationship is another matter though not so hard. What you have to overcome is fear of the girl getting a bad rep, fear of getting played because too many guys have gone over and taken advantage and we do have a bad rep there for this. Aso the fear that if something comes of a relationship, we will eventually abandon her and leave her to go home. She may not want to move around the world so far away from her friends and family and what if you dont want to stay.. All thses can be deal breakers for many girls, but again due to the population as a whole, its a numbers game that is decisively in your favor. For every 1000 who will think those issues are too big to overcome there are still 10 hot girls right here on this very block just waiting to meet you. And you will know them because when you walk around smiling and ni hao-ing them all, there will be some who smile a bit harder and hold your gaze a bit longer than the rest.

      China is NOTHING like the West... And don't let the sex ratio issue deter you.. It only matters within Chinese society and as a foreigner you are well outside of those constraints.

  2. You left out one more whammy - try finding a single girl who can actually offer something besides the indoor plumbing that doesn't have at least one child! Good luck with that.

  3. One more thing, just to toss out a few fun facts.

    How many men do you think are at least six feet tall? About 14.5%

    How many men make six figuru incomes? Pre-recession, maybe 5%

    How many would you think possess both of the above characteristics and be model-good looking?

    Good luck, "ladies".


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